Maula is this setting’s equivalent of the Encyclopedists. Because she could write one on any of those subjects, and the royals will be about as happy about it as the Bourbons were.
If maula wanted someone to know she killed someone she would have signed her work
If she didnt want soneone to know she killed someone she wouldnt even be a suspect
The fact they think she did it is ptetty damning proof she didn’t
Though I gotta admit: when Lucas said Maula’d have used something sharper and easier to wield, I did not think Maula’d actually write the whole list of what it could be…
Well, there’s probably a few other things on that list, too, though.
Courtly dress doesn’t seem to suit her, especially the lipstick and the wig.
It makes you wonder if she’s deliberately making it looks as bad as she can to poke fun at ‘fancy folks’ or if she’s trying to make it work and not caring if it does 😉
At least she remembered to wear pants with her flowing gown…
While she may have said it lovingly, reading Maula calling King Runtherd "the runt" struck me as off-putting and disrespectful of a man who was trying to save her.
Having just been called out recently for describing a young woman as "a girl" I may be overly sensitive to such phrasing.
Yeah, Carruthers does not look pleased in that last panel. Though I imagine her ire is aimed less at anything Maula said, and more at her fellow investigator who can’t even try to appear impartial here.
> reading Maula calling King Runtherd "the runt" struck me as off-putting and disrespectful of a man who was trying to save her.
It IS disrespectful. She doesn’t respect him. (Neither does Cadugan.) If her opinion doesn’t turn on a dime when she stands to gain something from him, some might call that integrity.
Ah, yes. It is easy to forget the role he played in the war against Ranna, how his own impetuousness led to his capture and being "converted" so easily. And that the decade or so after the war seems to have seen him become less Louis XIII of France, but Ludwig II of Bavaria: embittered due to unrequited love, liable to be called "mad" when his reign ends.
I do have a soft spot for the king, I admit. Even if he can be a royal pain.
Looking back at strip 2586, where Runt seemed to earn Cadugan’s respect, makes Cadugan’s current attitude towards Runt less of an "That’s just normal for Cadugan" and more of a big "OUCH".
"Runt seemed to earn Cadugan’s respect"
Respect, just like trust, can not only be gained, but lost as well. People change with time, and not always for the better. I got the impression Runts lack of luck with ladies did have a negative impact on his personality.
As for Maula, well… Unlike Cadugan, he never gave her a reason to respect him to begin with. They had little (if any) personal connections, and as queen Maula likely cared only as much about his politics, as she had to (which more or less means not triggering wars with Elegrost for Lucas sake). All in all, Runt didn’t have much chance to, nor actually did many things that could have impressed Maula.
As for Runt trying to save her… I would wager he is doing it to avoid unwanted diplomatical issues rather than for her person – and she is well aware of it.
Unintentional offence is one thing, taking someone to task over something they couldn’t be expected to know is another matter entirely.
It seems that entirely too many people are overly concerned with making others say what they want them to while refusing to acquiesce to anyone else’s preferences, then resort to verbal abuse like ‘cis’ and ‘boomer’ and other things like they weren’t essentially the same things.
I didn’t use the ‘right pronouns’ because I didn’t know what they were and can’t be asking every person fifteen questions before saying hello ?
You were ‘called out’ because you let them and they exerted control over you as they wanted to.
My response is "Too bad, get used to it…somewhere else"
Yeah, I guess there is two ways you can go with that.
1: Once you’ve learned what direction the world is trying to change for the better, you can put in an effort to go with it. Help create an environment for acceptance and make a difference.
Or
2: You can say "fuck that, I ain’t changin’ shit. You don’t like it YOU deal with it."
Both are valid reactions. One’s just more… assholish. You do you, man.
It is like crossing a river, and feeling the current. You can plow ahead, and your strength will help you maintain a direct path, though the water will drag and sap your strength, and turbulent wakes surround you.
Or you can move with the current, letting it you carry you off your planned course, but getting back once you reach the other bank will cost less energy, and leave less muddied waters behind.
My guess is it’s probably a typo and she said "I heard that Runt…"
Runt is capitalized so it’s a name. If it was supposed to be "the runt" it wouldn’t be. Besides, that is what he was originally called. He didn’t start going by Runtherd until he became king.
Considering that Maula Bloodhound is 78 (see my earlier comments where I erred on the side of caution), and a former ruler herself, she can afford to call the young reclusive monarch by the name he was known by when he first gained the throne, and remembers how he briefly fought on the side of Ranna.
"Briefly" is a bit of an understatement. His fighting on Ranna's side consisted entirely of riding to the battlefield and then immediately switching sides first chance he got. If anyone would hold *that* against him, I'd lose a lot of respect for them.
It would be interesting to find out whether that is her actual hair, teased and such (she is old enough for it to be going white), or whether she has her own black hair neatly done up in a bun under the over-done wig.
It is good to finaly see her in any case. Everyone’s favorite battle-scarred former queen and master at all the arts of war, on any kind of battlefield.
I just want to give my compliments to Rich for aging Maula both realistically and gracefully. She’s in her early sixties by now, and it seems orcs and humans age at the same rate. So with that in mind, she’s done well. We all end up carrying more than we want, muscle mass is getting harder to maintain but she’s done well, and even the style of dress Rich gave her is fitting: she has her feminine side, but she is a warrior first and foremost.
Heck, even her calling the King Runtherd "the runt" is a reminder of her role in his past, as queen in her own right back before her kingdom was destroyed in a war that changed the face of the land and its beliefs. Long ago it may have been, but we know where her lack of courtesy comes from — unlike Captain Carruthers, who was a child during those events and probably only heard tales of why the sky was dark for days back then.
Tradition dictates that I end with a pun, but the only one that I can think of is that when Maula is around, all I can think of is cleavage. Don’t axe me why.
That is my minimum based upon her still getting it on with Glon’s dad (the one Lucas thought was his dad when he was growing up). Putting her in her fifties when the Black Mountain went kerblooey. However, she may have reached sixty by then. And the problem with "evil" races in the bad old days was that it was assumed orcs had shorter lifespans merely because it was rare to meet one that didn’t meet a violent end.
So yeah, consider my age guess a minimum. After all, Maula—I mean, Lady Bloodhand—has treated her body like a temple: worshipped, but also plundered, pushed to its limits, used as a refuge when under siege, and showing its history. She is definitely one of those who believe the goal in life is not to die with a perfect corpse, but to look back when it is all done and say "wow, what a ride that was!"
Buuut her youngest son was already an adult with a bunch of children when the Black Mountain went kerblooey. Her being in her early fifties then just feels too young.
Well, we don’t know how early she started with a family. She could have been just as well 25 as 15.
Now, I guessed her age to be in her middle/late twenties at the time Glon was born. Glon was 16? 17? as we get to know him, and till the Rannite wars the story covered some 13-15 years. 10 more years passed since. So yeah, it is likely that she is in her sixties, though I would guess she is close to 70.
Or she could’ve been 30 when she started a family/approaching 40 when she had Glon… just saying.
Honestly, we shouldn’t have to guess. Rich has posted character ages in a comment somewhere before… I just wish I could remember under which strip (am I supposed to re-check the comments for all strips starting with the Force of Hobbits arc and up until Ranna’s defeat? I’m kinda a bit too tired for that…)
At the age of 17, Maula was married to an important Orc soldier in the Black Mountain. He took her famous name and became "General Bloodhand". They had many children together over the years, most of whom became soldiers like their father.
Maula is seduced by Baron Owen Greyfort at the age of 34. She gives birth to Glon, but sends him off to Elegrost to be raised by Owen.
At 38, she slips into Elegrost to find news of Glon, but gets caught up in the GNU tournament in Lifecross & Hoggs. She attends yearly ever since.
At 54, Maula is reunited with Glon after Gren purchases him from the Hobgoblin slavers.
At 58 she becomes Queen Under the Mountain.
At 67 she leads the assault against the Rannites in the Black Mountain. That same year she abdicates the crown to Glon.
At 78 Maula attends the reopening of the GNU tournaments at Lifecross & Hoggs, but gets accused of MURDER!
No, seriously, it’s good to have actual timelines, and I hold by my compliment on aging her realistically. There are signs of less tone in ner muscles, of gravity being unrelenting on connecting tissue, but also that Maula has kept fit. And her orc manners may be why she doesn’t hide her body under corsets and wide skirts: gotta show off those scars, baby! She EARNED that body.
Trust me, with a lady as temperamental as Lady Maula can be, it’s best to err on the side of youth. The trick is to be a compliment and not too obvious, because then it becomes disrespectful.
What we are seeing here is also how Maula has moved into Nanny Ogg territory. For those of you unfamiliar with her, my only reply os that you need to read more Terry Pratchett, especially the novels "Wyrd Sisters", "Witches Abroad", "Lords and Ladies" and "Maskerade".
Oh, her sneakier ways are so sneaky that Holmes himself would turn down the case because it is so obvious that it was an accident, or that the killer was whoever Maula wanted to implicate.
Or that sneakier means leaving a smoking crater so that people think it was a repeat of the Black Mountain, leaving no witnesses alive in a radius of several kilometers.
You know that thing we call "death by natural causes"? Doesn’t exist. We just assume that things weren’t meant to live forever, because Maula is very, very sneaky.
"This person died of Natural Causes."
"But there’s an axe sticking out of him!!"
"Still Natural Causes."
"How do you figure that?"
"He annoyed Maula."
"Ah. Good point. So… what do we do with the axe?"
"Clean it up and return it to Lady Bloodhand."
"Murder was in fact a fairly uncommon event in Ankh-Morpork, but there were a lot of suicides. Walking in the night-time alleyways of The Shades was suicide. Asking for a short in a dwarf bar was suicide. Saying ‘Got rocks in your head?’ to a troll was suicide. You could commit suicide very easily, if you weren’t careful."
That was always the *biggest* reason to doubt that Maula was guilty. If they heard that she killed someone with a sword, that would be believable. If she wanted to kill someone secretly though, nobody would ever know it was her. She certainly wouldn't be the prime suspect.
I love Maula <3
Don’t we all? <3
"Playful Evil" is the best alignment!
"Playful Evil" is the BEST alignment!
Cats
Is ‘transorbital lobotomy’ on that list, Maula? ‘Cause you may want to spill some ink on that page.
She already said she would leave her favorites off the other list so we can assume any she dosent mention are not oversites
Maula probably wrote a book (or more) on the discrete and not-so-discrete ways of assassination.
And how to wage War…
And how to run a Kingdom… and survive to get out of the job
And the advantages and disadvantages of weapons…
Maula is this setting’s equivalent of the Encyclopedists. Because she could write one on any of those subjects, and the royals will be about as happy about it as the Bourbons were.
I mean, if you’re gonna do wrong, do wrong right!
But Maura, the ways and tools for the kill weren’t used for their efficiency.
If maula wanted someone to know she killed someone she would have signed her work
If she didnt want soneone to know she killed someone she wouldnt even be a suspect
The fact they think she did it is ptetty damning proof she didn’t
Maula, never change you glorious Orc Queen.
Has she shrunk?
Maula is the best XD
They can wrap this whole investigation up quickly if they just ask her who did it and how. Once they know that, the why will fall into place.
"The Runt" 😀
Though I gotta admit: when Lucas said Maula’d have used something sharper and easier to wield, I did not think Maula’d actually write the whole list of what it could be…
Well, there’s probably a few other things on that list, too, though.
Maula is proficient with many weapons, but her sharpest weapon is her wit.
Items 1, 2 and 3 on the list:
1. With my bare hands
2. With my booted feet
3. With my teefers.
4. The quill I’m writing this with.
5. The desk I’m leaning on..
The desk wouldn’t be very sneaky. Especially specifically the desk in the room she’s staying in.
Ah, but she knows over seven hundred WAYS in which the desk could kill you. Nineteen of them remain undetectable by any known science or spell.
That’s a good point 😀
One of my favourite sayings when people irritated me 🙂
"I know eleven ways to kill a man with a pen, hold still and I’ll show you one…"
The paper this is writen on
The ink im using
The inkwell
Her working title is "How to murder someone and get away with it" *grin*
Courtly dress doesn’t seem to suit her, especially the lipstick and the wig.
It makes you wonder if she’s deliberately making it looks as bad as she can to poke fun at ‘fancy folks’ or if she’s trying to make it work and not caring if it does 😉
At least she remembered to wear pants with her flowing gown…
While she may have said it lovingly, reading Maula calling King Runtherd "the runt" struck me as off-putting and disrespectful of a man who was trying to save her.
Having just been called out recently for describing a young woman as "a girl" I may be overly sensitive to such phrasing.
Yeah, Carruthers does not look pleased in that last panel. Though I imagine her ire is aimed less at anything Maula said, and more at her fellow investigator who can’t even try to appear impartial here.
You’re forgetting that Maula knew him back when he was a squire named Runt. And he really hasn’t done anything since then to improve that impression.
> While she may have said it lovingly,
She didn’t.
> reading Maula calling King Runtherd "the runt" struck me as off-putting and disrespectful of a man who was trying to save her.
It IS disrespectful. She doesn’t respect him. (Neither does Cadugan.) If her opinion doesn’t turn on a dime when she stands to gain something from him, some might call that integrity.
t!
"With respect," said Ponder, without respect, "we cannot."
– Terry Pratchett, _The Last Hero_
Ah, yes. It is easy to forget the role he played in the war against Ranna, how his own impetuousness led to his capture and being "converted" so easily. And that the decade or so after the war seems to have seen him become less Louis XIII of France, but Ludwig II of Bavaria: embittered due to unrequited love, liable to be called "mad" when his reign ends.
I do have a soft spot for the king, I admit. Even if he can be a royal pain.
Looking back at strip 2586, where Runt seemed to earn Cadugan’s respect, makes Cadugan’s current attitude towards Runt less of an "That’s just normal for Cadugan" and more of a big "OUCH".
"Runt seemed to earn Cadugan’s respect"
Respect, just like trust, can not only be gained, but lost as well. People change with time, and not always for the better. I got the impression Runts lack of luck with ladies did have a negative impact on his personality.
As for Maula, well… Unlike Cadugan, he never gave her a reason to respect him to begin with. They had little (if any) personal connections, and as queen Maula likely cared only as much about his politics, as she had to (which more or less means not triggering wars with Elegrost for Lucas sake). All in all, Runt didn’t have much chance to, nor actually did many things that could have impressed Maula.
As for Runt trying to save her… I would wager he is doing it to avoid unwanted diplomatical issues rather than for her person – and she is well aware of it.
Unintentional offence is one thing, taking someone to task over something they couldn’t be expected to know is another matter entirely.
It seems that entirely too many people are overly concerned with making others say what they want them to while refusing to acquiesce to anyone else’s preferences, then resort to verbal abuse like ‘cis’ and ‘boomer’ and other things like they weren’t essentially the same things.
I didn’t use the ‘right pronouns’ because I didn’t know what they were and can’t be asking every person fifteen questions before saying hello ?
You were ‘called out’ because you let them and they exerted control over you as they wanted to.
My response is "Too bad, get used to it…somewhere else"
Yes, dear.
That’s nice, dear.
t!
Yeah, I guess there is two ways you can go with that.
1: Once you’ve learned what direction the world is trying to change for the better, you can put in an effort to go with it. Help create an environment for acceptance and make a difference.
Or
2: You can say "fuck that, I ain’t changin’ shit. You don’t like it YOU deal with it."
Both are valid reactions. One’s just more… assholish. You do you, man.
It is like crossing a river, and feeling the current. You can plow ahead, and your strength will help you maintain a direct path, though the water will drag and sap your strength, and turbulent wakes surround you.
Or you can move with the current, letting it you carry you off your planned course, but getting back once you reach the other bank will cost less energy, and leave less muddied waters behind.
My guess is it’s probably a typo and she said "I heard that Runt…"
Runt is capitalized so it’s a name. If it was supposed to be "the runt" it wouldn’t be. Besides, that is what he was originally called. He didn’t start going by Runtherd until he became king.
Wrong!
t!
Considering that Maula Bloodhound is 78 (see my earlier comments where I erred on the side of caution), and a former ruler herself, she can afford to call the young reclusive monarch by the name he was known by when he first gained the throne, and remembers how he briefly fought on the side of Ranna.
All this to say that she’s too old to care, and has the scars to prove that she can get away with a little lèse magesté.
"Briefly" is a bit of an understatement. His fighting on Ranna's side consisted entirely of riding to the battlefield and then immediately switching sides first chance he got. If anyone would hold *that* against him, I'd lose a lot of respect for them.
It would be interesting to find out whether that is her actual hair, teased and such (she is old enough for it to be going white), or whether she has her own black hair neatly done up in a bun under the over-done wig.
It is good to finaly see her in any case. Everyone’s favorite battle-scarred former queen and master at all the arts of war, on any kind of battlefield.
Maula’s already had white hair pre-timeskip.
You are correct, my memory just wants to revert her to her younger self. And un-imagine that hairdo. 😛
I just want to give my compliments to Rich for aging Maula both realistically and gracefully. She’s in her early sixties by now, and it seems orcs and humans age at the same rate. So with that in mind, she’s done well. We all end up carrying more than we want, muscle mass is getting harder to maintain but she’s done well, and even the style of dress Rich gave her is fitting: she has her feminine side, but she is a warrior first and foremost.
Heck, even her calling the King Runtherd "the runt" is a reminder of her role in his past, as queen in her own right back before her kingdom was destroyed in a war that changed the face of the land and its beliefs. Long ago it may have been, but we know where her lack of courtesy comes from — unlike Captain Carruthers, who was a child during those events and probably only heard tales of why the sky was dark for days back then.
Tradition dictates that I end with a pun, but the only one that I can think of is that when Maula is around, all I can think of is cleavage. Don’t axe me why.
Wait, only early sixties? I thought she was older.
That is my minimum based upon her still getting it on with Glon’s dad (the one Lucas thought was his dad when he was growing up). Putting her in her fifties when the Black Mountain went kerblooey. However, she may have reached sixty by then. And the problem with "evil" races in the bad old days was that it was assumed orcs had shorter lifespans merely because it was rare to meet one that didn’t meet a violent end.
So yeah, consider my age guess a minimum. After all, Maula—I mean, Lady Bloodhand—has treated her body like a temple: worshipped, but also plundered, pushed to its limits, used as a refuge when under siege, and showing its history. She is definitely one of those who believe the goal in life is not to die with a perfect corpse, but to look back when it is all done and say "wow, what a ride that was!"
Buuut her youngest son was already an adult with a bunch of children when the Black Mountain went kerblooey. Her being in her early fifties then just feels too young.
Well, we don’t know how early she started with a family. She could have been just as well 25 as 15.
Now, I guessed her age to be in her middle/late twenties at the time Glon was born. Glon was 16? 17? as we get to know him, and till the Rannite wars the story covered some 13-15 years. 10 more years passed since. So yeah, it is likely that she is in her sixties, though I would guess she is close to 70.
Or she could’ve been 30 when she started a family/approaching 40 when she had Glon… just saying.
Honestly, we shouldn’t have to guess. Rich has posted character ages in a comment somewhere before… I just wish I could remember under which strip (am I supposed to re-check the comments for all strips starting with the Force of Hobbits arc and up until Ranna’s defeat? I’m kinda a bit too tired for that…)
Orcs and humans age the same?
Here’s a brief timeline explaining Maula’s age:
At the age of 17, Maula was married to an important Orc soldier in the Black Mountain. He took her famous name and became "General Bloodhand". They had many children together over the years, most of whom became soldiers like their father.
Maula is seduced by Baron Owen Greyfort at the age of 34. She gives birth to Glon, but sends him off to Elegrost to be raised by Owen.
At 38, she slips into Elegrost to find news of Glon, but gets caught up in the GNU tournament in Lifecross & Hoggs. She attends yearly ever since.
At 54, Maula is reunited with Glon after Gren purchases him from the Hobgoblin slavers.
At 58 she becomes Queen Under the Mountain.
At 67 she leads the assault against the Rannites in the Black Mountain. That same year she abdicates the crown to Glon.
At 78 Maula attends the reopening of the GNU tournaments at Lifecross & Hoggs, but gets accused of MURDER!
YES. My little ploy worked!
No, seriously, it’s good to have actual timelines, and I hold by my compliment on aging her realistically. There are signs of less tone in ner muscles, of gravity being unrelenting on connecting tissue, but also that Maula has kept fit. And her orc manners may be why she doesn’t hide her body under corsets and wide skirts: gotta show off those scars, baby! She EARNED that body.
Told ya she’s not in her early sixties! =Ъ
Cunningham’s Law: "The best way to get the right answer on the internet is not to ask a question; it’s to post the wrong answer."
Shame on Rich for forcing his readers to resort to invoking that law, then 😉
Trust me, with a lady as temperamental as Lady Maula can be, it’s best to err on the side of youth. The trick is to be a compliment and not too obvious, because then it becomes disrespectful.
What we are seeing here is also how Maula has moved into Nanny Ogg territory. For those of you unfamiliar with her, my only reply os that you need to read more Terry Pratchett, especially the novels "Wyrd Sisters", "Witches Abroad", "Lords and Ladies" and "Maskerade".
I can’t be a crone! None of my bras would fit!
"’Act my age?’ Don’t have to act, can do it natural-like. Acting *half* my age…now that’s the tricky bit."
– Nanny Ogg
Thank you!
Lucas looks good for 43/44, too.
Part of that may be due to his werewolf blood, even with reduced magic.
Is there a "two inch pin through the canthus" on the list?
I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if Maula’s sneakier ways would leave Sherlock Holmes baffled.
Oh, her sneakier ways are so sneaky that Holmes himself would turn down the case because it is so obvious that it was an accident, or that the killer was whoever Maula wanted to implicate.
Or that sneakier means leaving a smoking crater so that people think it was a repeat of the Black Mountain, leaving no witnesses alive in a radius of several kilometers.
You know that thing we call "death by natural causes"? Doesn’t exist. We just assume that things weren’t meant to live forever, because Maula is very, very sneaky.
"This person died of Natural Causes."
"But there’s an axe sticking out of him!!"
"Still Natural Causes."
"How do you figure that?"
"He annoyed Maula."
"Ah. Good point. So… what do we do with the axe?"
"Clean it up and return it to Lady Bloodhand."
"Murder was in fact a fairly uncommon event in Ankh-Morpork, but there were a lot of suicides. Walking in the night-time alleyways of The Shades was suicide. Asking for a short in a dwarf bar was suicide. Saying ‘Got rocks in your head?’ to a troll was suicide. You could commit suicide very easily, if you weren’t careful."
― Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms
Have to love Sir Pratchett.
"He died of natural causes."
"How do you figure? He got stabbed in the heart!"
"And that would cause you to die, naturally."
That was always the *biggest* reason to doubt that Maula was guilty. If they heard that she killed someone with a sword, that would be believable. If she wanted to kill someone secretly though, nobody would ever know it was her. She certainly wouldn't be the prime suspect.