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Rich Morris' Comics - YAFGC and The ComixBlog :: View topic - My newest *original* writing in forever
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My newest *original* writing in forever
https://www.yafgc.net/forums/viewtopic.php?f=20&t=1773
Page 1 of 1

Author:  King Rat [ Fri Mar 25, 2011 2:31 pm ]
Post subject:  My newest *original* writing in forever

I've been writing fanfic since I restarted on writing like 6 years ago, so I made an effort to write something original, just to check that I hadn't lost the facility entirely. It is pretty short, butI thought it turned out pretty well; of course, comments are welcome.

The Search

Jack was tired.

His feet pounded the path, and sweat streamed down his face. His legs screamed with every further step. His arms protested, as well, the weight of the heavy cooler he was carrying.

"Where are they?" he said. He cursed as he stumbled, then slammed the cooler down and tied his shoe lace. He snatched the cooler back up and took a few deep breaths before resuming his run, eyes frantically scanning the path and the woods to either side.

The barking was getting closer, and the voices...

From somewhere deep within, he found the strength to go just a bit faster. Seconds later, he burst back into the clearing where, just hours before, he and his family had been picnicking. Now, there was no trace.

He dropped the cooler and wiped at his face, clearing the stinging sweat from his eyes.

"God dammit where are they?"

His eyes scanned the clearing, even as he began moving forward, searching the grass with a frantic care, his hands scrabbling amongst the grass, twigs and new-fallen leaves.

They were coming closer!

He redoubled his efforts.

Their steps crunched on the twigs as they entered the clearing, the dog's barking keeping pace...

His expression changed to a manic grin as his hands closed on them. He leaped to his feet and spun, ignoring his protesting muscles, holding them high-


"See, honey? I told you I remembered where I left the keys!"

Author:  M'reen [ Sat Mar 26, 2011 1:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My newest *original* writing in forever

Liked it :mrgreen:

Author:  mrfranklin [ Sat Mar 26, 2011 6:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My newest *original* writing in forever

Nice. :D As they say, always leave 'em wanting more - and you did!

Author:  Morgana [ Mon Mar 28, 2011 8:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: My newest *original* writing in forever

Funny! i would like for the dog to do something as well since it was mentioned before.

Author:  King Rat [ Tue Mar 29, 2011 4:32 am ]
Post subject:  Re: My newest *original* writing in forever

Thanks for the kind words!

@ Morgana: Well, I really can't say much, she did her part as did the rest of the pursuers ;) . But I can tell you this: Her name is Ms. T (a compromise; the little girl who had dibs on naming her called her Tiara Magicpony Diamond Mermaid Glitterstar. Really, a bit too long). She's an Irish Wolfhound/Border Collie mix. Both parents are purebred - a bit of a scandalous liason at a dog show, it seems.

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